Sleep Training Basics: Methods, Timing, and What to Know

Sleep training is a topic that sparks strong opinions. Some families swear by it; others choose different approaches. There's no single right answer—what matters is finding what works for your family while keeping your baby safe and healthy.

This guide provides balanced information about sleep training approaches.

What You Need to Know AAP

What sleep training is:

• Teaching baby to fall asleep independently
• Various methods with different approaches
• Goal: baby learns to self-soothe
• Not the same as night weaning

What it's NOT:

• Required for all babies
• Something you have to do
• The only way babies learn to sleep
• Harmful when done appropriately
• A moral judgment on parenting

The AAP position:

• Doesn't endorse a specific method
• Acknowledges most methods can be effective
• Emphasizes safe sleep practices
• Notes research shows no harm from appropriate sleep training
• Supports parental choice AAP

When Is Baby Ready?

General guidelines:

• Most experts suggest waiting until 4-6 months
• Baby should be developmentally ready
• Night feeds may still be needed
• Check with pediatrician first

Signs of readiness:

• At least 4 months old
• Healthy weight gain established
• No medical conditions affecting sleep
• Able to go some hours without eating overnight

Not ready if:

• Under 4 months old
• Medical or developmental concerns
• Going through illness or major transition
• Not gaining weight appropriately

Important: Sleep training is optional. Many families don't formally sleep train and babies still learn to sleep. AAP

Overview of Methods

Extinction ("Cry It Out"):

• Put baby down awake
• Leave room until morning (or feed time)
• Don't return for crying
• Usually fastest results (3-7 nights)
• Can be very difficult for parents

Graduated Extinction (Ferber Method):

• Put baby down awake
• Check at increasing intervals (3 min, 5 min, 10 min)
• Brief check-ins (1-2 minutes)
• Don't pick up during checks
• Results typically in 3-7 nights

Chair Method:

• Sit in chair near crib while baby falls asleep
• Gradually move chair farther away over days
• Eventually leave room
• Less crying but takes longer
• Good for parents who need to be present

Pick Up/Put Down:

• Pick up when crying, put down when calm
• Repeat as needed
• Baby stays in crib when calm
• Can take longer, more interactive
• Works well for some babies

Bedtime Fading:

• Gradually shift bedtime earlier
• Put baby down at natural sleep time initially
• Move earlier by 15-30 minutes as sleep improves
• Very gentle approach
• Takes longer

No-Cry Methods:

• Gradual weaning of sleep associations
• Very slow, incremental changes
• Minimal to no crying
• Can take weeks to months
• Parent stays very involved

Choosing an Approach

Consider:

• Your parenting philosophy
• Your temperament and baby's temperament
• Your need for quick results vs. gradual change
• What you can sustain consistently
• Any unique circumstances

There's no "best" method:

• All methods can work
• Consistency matters more than method
• Choose what you'll actually follow through with
• It's okay to adjust as you go

You don't have to sleep train at all:

• Many families don't
• Babies eventually sleep without training
• Responsive parenting is also valid
• No approach is morally superior

What to Expect

First few nights:

• Usually hardest
• Crying is common with most methods
• May take 30-60 minutes initially
• It typically gets better quickly

Typical timeline:

• Most babies respond within 3-7 nights
• Some take longer
• Progress isn't always linear
• Setbacks happen (illness, travel)

What success looks like:

• Baby falls asleep with less parental help
• Night wakings decrease (though night feeds may continue)
• Baby can resettle between sleep cycles
• Not necessarily "sleeping through the night"

Common Concerns

"Will it harm my baby?"
Research shows no negative effects on attachment, behavior, or development from appropriate sleep training methods done at appropriate ages. Studies following children years later find no differences. AAP

"How much crying is too much?"
Most methods involve some crying. Check on baby if crying is very unusual or if you're concerned about safety. Very prolonged crying (over an hour consistently) may mean baby isn't ready or method needs adjustment.

"What if it doesn't work?"

• Ensure baby is developmentally ready
• Be very consistent (method chosen matters less than consistency)
• Rule out medical issues
• Consider trying different approach
• Some babies need more time

"Can I still respond to hunger?"
Yes. Sleep training and night weaning are separate. Many parents continue feeding at night while teaching self-settling at bedtime and other wake-ups.

Setting Up for Success

Before starting:

• Healthy bedtime routine established
• Safe sleep environment
• Age-appropriate schedule
• No major changes happening
• Both parents on same page

During training:

• Be consistent—this is key
• Don't change methods mid-approach
• Expect some hard nights
• Support each other
• Maintain safe sleep practices

After training:

• Continue consistent routine
• Expect occasional setbacks
• Illness, travel, growth spurts can disrupt
• May need brief "refresher"

What Other Parents Ask

Q: Does sleep training mean I can't feed my baby at night?
A: No. Sleep training (teaching self-settling) and night weaning (stopping night feeds) are different things. Many parents continue night feeds during and after sleep training. Work with your pediatrician on appropriate night feeds for baby's age. AAP

Q: Is sleep training right for all families?
A: No. Sleep training is optional. Many families don't do it and babies learn to sleep eventually. Choose based on your values, needs, and situation. There's no right or wrong choice.

Q: What if one parent wants to sleep train and the other doesn't?
A: Get on the same page first. Discuss concerns, review information together, and find an approach you both can support. Consistency between parents is important for success.

Q: Can I stop if it's too hard?
A: Yes. You can always stop and try again later or try a different approach. However, stopping and starting inconsistently can be confusing for baby. If you're going to stop, take a break before trying again.

Q: My baby is 8 months old and we haven't sleep trained. Is it too late?
A: No. While 4-6 months is often suggested as a starting point, sleep training can be done at later ages. Older babies may be more persistent but can still learn.

The Bottom Line

Sleep training is one option for helping babies learn independent sleep. Multiple methods exist, all can be effective, and consistency matters more than which method you choose. It's also completely valid not to sleep train. Do what works for your family. AAP

Key points:

• Wait until at least 4 months
• Many methods can work
• Consistency is most important
• Sleep training is optional
• No lasting harm from appropriate methods
• Night feeds can continue

Clara is here to help you navigate sleep decisions.