Helping Your Child with Homework

Few aspects of parenting school-age children generate as much daily stress as homework. The nightly routine of cajoling, supervising, and sometimes battling over assignments can drain both parents and children. Yet homework, when handled well, builds skills that extend far beyond academic content—including time management, persistence, and independent problem-solving. Understanding your role in the homework process, and what that role is not, can transform this daily challenge into an opportunity for growth.

Understanding the Purpose of Homework AAP

Before diving into strategies, it helps to understand why homework exists and what it's supposed to accomplish. The American Academy of Pediatrics notes that well-designed homework reinforces classroom learning, gives students practice with new skills, helps develop time management and responsibility, builds independent work habits, and provides parents insight into what children are learning. AAP

The key phrase is "well-designed." Excessive, poorly planned, or developmentally inappropriate homework doesn't serve these purposes and can actually undermine learning by creating stress and negative associations with academics. The general guideline is the "10-minute rule"—about 10 minutes of homework per grade level per night. A second grader should have roughly 20 minutes; a sixth grader about 60 minutes. If homework consistently takes much longer than this, something needs to be addressed. NEA

Research on homework shows mixed results, with benefits more clearly demonstrated for older students than younger ones. The National Education Association notes that for elementary students, the primary value of homework may be developing habits and routines rather than academic content. NEA

Creating an Effective Homework Routine AAP

Consistency is the foundation of homework success. Children thrive on routines, and knowing when and where homework happens reduces daily negotiation and resistance.

Timing matters. Most children need a break after school—a snack, some physical activity, downtime to decompress. Jumping straight into homework when they're mentally depleted from a full school day often backfires. However, waiting too long means tackling homework when they're tired and resistant. Find a consistent time that works for your family—after a snack and 20-30 minute break, but not too close to bedtime. AAP

Environment matters too. A quiet, well-lit space with minimal distractions sets children up for success. This doesn't have to be a separate study room—the kitchen table works well for many families, especially younger children who benefit from parental presence. Remove TVs, phones, and other devices from the homework area unless they're needed for the assignment. Have necessary supplies readily available so time isn't wasted gathering materials. NEA

Different children have different needs. Some concentrate better with background music; others need silence. Some focus better with a parent nearby; others need solitude. Pay attention to what helps your individual child and adjust accordingly. AAP

Duration should have reasonable limits. Working on homework for hours on end is counterproductive—attention and retention decline with extended work sessions. If homework is taking dramatically longer than expected (significantly beyond the 10-minute-per-grade guideline), that's information to share with the teacher, not a problem to solve by simply working longer. NEA

Your Role: Supporting Without Taking Over AAP

The most important skill to develop is knowing when to help and when to step back. Your goal is to create conditions for success and guide your child toward independence—not to ensure every assignment is perfect.

Be available and interested. Let your child know you're there if they have questions. Show interest in what they're learning. Check in periodically without hovering. The AAP emphasizes that parental involvement matters, but the nature of that involvement should support rather than supplant the child's work. AAP

Help them understand, not just complete. When your child is stuck, resist the urge to provide answers. Instead, ask questions that guide their thinking: "What do the directions say to do first?" "What do you already know about this?" "Where could you find that information?" Help them access resources—textbook, notes, appropriate websites—rather than simply telling them what to write. NEA

Teach study skills explicitly. Many children don't automatically know how to study effectively. Teach strategies like breaking large projects into smaller steps, using practice tests for studying, summarizing key points in their own words, and spacing out studying over time rather than cramming. These meta-skills matter more than any single assignment. AAP

Check for completion, not perfection. It's appropriate to ensure homework is complete before your child moves on. It's not your job to correct every error—that's what teachers need to see to understand what students have and haven't mastered. Turning in perfect work that reflects your help rather than your child's understanding defeats the purpose of homework. NEA

Common Homework Challenges NEA

Certain challenges come up repeatedly for families navigating homework, and having strategies ready helps.

"I don't have any homework" is a common claim that may or may not be accurate. Establish systems to verify: check online parent portals, use assignment planners, contact the teacher if claims seem consistently implausible. Some children genuinely have less homework; others are avoiding or forgetting. Knowing which situation you're dealing with matters. NEA

Homework taking forever can have multiple causes. Learning differences like dyslexia, ADHD, or processing disorders can make work that should take 20 minutes stretch into hours. Perfectionism causes some children to redo work repeatedly or get stuck on getting everything exactly right. Distractions—hidden phones, daydreaming, frequent breaks—extend homework unnecessarily. Environmental factors like noise, hunger, or tiredness matter. Identify the root cause before addressing the problem. AAP

Procrastination affects many school-age children who haven't yet developed self-regulation skills. Strategies include starting with easier tasks to build momentum, using timers to create urgency, breaking large tasks into smaller chunks, removing tempting distractions (especially phones and devices), and working alongside your child on your own tasks. NEA

Emotional meltdowns during homework signal that something is wrong—the work is too difficult, there's underlying stress, the child is overtired, or the homework situation has become too high-pressure. When meltdowns occur, take a break. Offer comfort. Return when emotions have settled. If meltdowns are frequent, investigate deeper causes and consider involving the teacher or school counselor. AAP

When to Involve the Teacher AAP

Teachers are partners in your child's education, and they want to know when homework isn't working. The AAP recommends reaching out if homework consistently takes much longer than expected, your child regularly doesn't understand the assigned material, there are frequent tears, resistance, or meltdowns, you suspect a learning difference or attention issue, or the workload seems inappropriate for your child's age or developmental level. AAP

When contacting teachers, approach as partners seeking solutions rather than adversaries assigning blame. Most teachers will work with families to adjust homework as needed or provide additional support. NEA

The Special Case of Projects and Long-Term Assignments NEA

Long-term projects like book reports, science fair projects, or research papers require different strategies than daily homework. The National Education Association emphasizes that these assignments are specifically designed to build planning and time management skills—skills many children don't yet have. NEA

Help your child break the project into steps with intermediate deadlines. Create a timeline working backward from the due date. Check in at key milestones. Resist the urge to take over when things get close to the deadline—experiencing the natural consequences of procrastination, with your support, teaches more than a parent-rescued perfect project. AAP

Your role is teaching the process of managing large projects, not doing the project or even ensuring it's done to adult standards. A B-quality project the child did themselves is more valuable than an A-quality project the parent did. NEA

Homework and Screen Time AAP

Technology adds complexity to homework. Many assignments now require devices, making it harder to enforce "no screens during homework." At the same time, devices provide endless temptation for distraction.

Use parental controls to limit access during homework time to only what's needed for assignments. Consider apps that block distracting sites and apps during designated work periods. Keep devices in common areas, not bedrooms. Monitor screen use—a child doing homework on a computer may also be chatting, gaming, or watching videos. AAP

The AAP recommends that families develop media plans that address homework time specifically, balancing the educational benefits of technology with the need to minimize distraction. AAP

The Bottom Line

Homework is ultimately about learning—not just academic content, but skills like time management, persistence, and independent problem-solving. Your role is to create conditions for success, provide support when genuinely needed, and guide your child toward increasing independence.

Resist the urge to ensure every assignment is perfect. Let your child struggle appropriately—struggle is how learning happens. Communicate with teachers when homework isn't working. And remember that your relationship with your child matters more than any single assignment.

Clara is here to help you troubleshoot specific homework challenges, think through strategies for your child's particular situation, or decide when it might be time to involve the teacher. Don't hesitate to ask.